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Which ZAYN Songs Would These Harry Potter Characters Listen To Obsessively, To Be In His Spotify Wrapped 0.001%?

Which ZAYN Songs Would These Harry Potter Characters Listen To Obsessively, To Be In His Spotify Wrapped 0.001%?

Whether you refused to leave the cinema after that fateful date in July 12 years ago or it came in the form of a recommendation from Netflix, Harry Potter had its way of interweaving into our muggle lives. Perhaps you fell in love with Hogwarts itself, with floating candles showing off its high arches and dozens of tables filling out the Great Hall where there’d always be a seat waiting for you. Maybe it had something to do with the characters, Hermione Granger’s intellect, or Fred and George Weasley’s pranks. Either way, you weren’t alone in hoping an owl’s beak would poke at your window, holding an invitation for the following year’s curriculum. And you still aren’t. Celebrity folk even get in on the magical world! Accio Zayn Malik!

Zayn literally mapped out space on an already crowded tattoo gallery to etch out the great battle scene where Voldemort and Harry Potter go head to head on his leg! If that doesn’t show that Harry Potter reached far and wide, we’re not sure what will. Besides also being spotted in a Slytherin tie, he previously partnered with Harry Potter: Puzzles & Spells, an app on mobile devices. He helped with customization elements for your in-game avatar, so if you already had his face as your profile pic on Twitter, he could join you in the game by making your avatar just like him! 


While we’re not going to undergo a high-tech sorting quiz to figure out what house Zayn’s actually in, we thought we’d dive into his discography to determine what songs Harry Potter characters would listen to. Would Neville Longbottom break out into a dance battle inspired by Zayn’s X Factor moves to distract Voldemort? How about a looping spell, anyone? So whenever we open up our musical app of choice, his songs blast straight through the speakers. We have so many thoughts.

Draco Malfoy

We can all agree that Draco’s the bad boy of Hogwarts, not to mention he has a yikes level of emotional unavailability to work through. So why ‘Good Guy?’ Well, ‘Good Guy’ is really Bad Guy, as Zayn contrasts how he is often portrayed! What’s cool about ‘Good Guy,’ too, is that it samples Nancy Sinatra’s ‘Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down),’ the sort of suave beat we would need to see Draco sashay down the Hogwarts halls to.

Hermione Granger

Does any other song off Mind of Mine scream Hermione better than ‘sHe?’ We mean, she is her. Underneath her ferocious Gryffindor edges are her softer qualities. Hermione may be known for being the brain, but there’s also a fragility to her, almost having a hyper-independence if it weren’t for the other two-thirds of the golden trio, of course. Take the scene in the Deathly Hallows Part 1 when all memory of her leaves her muggle parents, removing herself from every photo frame on the fire stand as if she was never there to begin with… “Bright lights, but she’s fading.” But she’s also brilliant in every sense. She quite literally turns time, just as Zayn put: “Making time go slow when they show her the table.”

Professor Severus Snape

Image Source: Warner Bros/Courtesy Everett Collection

Beneath Snape’s grievous undertones (we mean, Harry Potter could be playing on the other side of the house, and he’d still be distinguishable from his accent!) is someone with a love story ripped straight from one of Zayn’s sad ballads! Basically, he was in love with Lily, Harry’s mother, who was one of the only people who ever really understood him. However, that love became unrequited after a while: her choosing James. Then the prophecy started, and Snape fell even more apart as he lost Lily in his arms, vowing himself at that moment to look after Harry, though subtly. We all have our theories about what ‘Good Years’ is about. In this case, it represents the sort of anguish Snape harbored over the years, giving up that short-lived chance at happiness. 

Luna Lovegood

‘River Road’ is perhaps one of the more poetic tracks off Nobody Is Listening, just a one-note melody, Zayn’s lullaby-like voice and lyrics marking a crumbling love as it goes stale. At least, that’s in the context of a relationship. Where Luna’s concerned, the question “Don’t you ever hope for something else?” is super poignant. Although independent, there was still a loneliness inside Luna that dissipated when she became a part of Dumbledore’s army. 

Ginny Weasley

Image Source: Warner Bros.

With Molly Weasley often whipping her boys and Harry into line, was there ever an unlikelihood that that spunkiness wouldn’t pass down to Ginny? Known for putting hexes on those she cast into the naughty corner, ‘Sour Diesel’ is the best song to represent her. From the second one presses play, you’re hypnotized by its beat. 

Neville Longbottom

From the smiley boy on X Factor to becoming the nation’s heartthrob, Zayn’s been through his own journey over the years, and so did Neville, perhaps having the most character development. After all, he did conjure up enough courage to not only stand against Voldemort when asked who’d join him upon thinking Harry was dead, but also killing the final Horcrux, which was the sort of giant snake you’d imagine finding in Australia’s outback! ‘DO SOMETHING GOOD’ sonically portrays those two sides and casts some juju to put out positivity. 

Ron Weasley

Image Source: Warner Bros.

Toss Ron’s jovial personality aside for the minute. Another reason we absolutely adore him is that he becomes a nervous puddle whenever Hermione walks into the room or the great hall. Hermione floating down the steps in a pink ombre, ruffled dress, Ron simply just gawking at her only to spend the rest of the night jealous! ‘rEaR vIeW’ speaks of that longing, even if super fans know the song is a response to himself, a self-reflection of all of the things he was feeling upon leaving One Direction and stepping out on his own. 

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As much as his name must remain silent, and we’ll make it a point not to utter it for at least this sentence, there wouldn’t be a franchise without the lack of a nose character! Voldemort (we did say only “this sentence”) is the ‘Entertainer,’ doing absolutely anything to gain a one-up on Harry. 

Harry Potter

Finally, for the boy who lived, one can simply listen to ‘tRuTh.’ While it seems to be another insight into how Zayn felt towards his time in One Direction, “I got caught up in this game” is the bitter truth of Harry’s journey. 

There may actually be as many Zayn songs as there are Harry Potter characters, with his 60+ song discography, and that phenomenal discography looks to be growing! The announcement of Zayn’s fourth studio album being in the works means more exploring of track options, even if it’s just note-taking on your lonesome after a HP marathon. What do you think matches up between your fave characters and Zayn songs? Is there an even better replacement song for one we’ve already laid out? Let us know through our Twitter @thehoneypop

Don’t worry. Our perfectly placed subtle hint that Zayn’s album is near doesn’t mean it’ll only be used for our wand-wielding attempts. We’ll be so on top of all the deets that you’ll know about it before your fandom friends do! So make sure to follow along on our Instagram and Facebook.


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